It has now been three days since the Chicago Police Department found the body of a bald, bearded man floating in the Navy Pier, and in a press conference this afternoon, Commissioner Gordon identified the individual as 45 year-old Chicago native Nathaniel Grey.
Gordon went on to reveal that Grey was an active member of the Heroclix community, and that due to the numerous stab wounds found all over his body, his death is suspected to be the result of foul play.
Our anonymous sources within the Chicago P.D. gave us the department’s shortlist of possible suspects, and on the top of the list is Rick Fraiser, the leader of the questionably-named Clix Mafia Heroclix team. Grey was reportedly a proud member of the Mafia, and stood firmly by the team’s policy of “Make the cut or get cut.”
“Nathaniel knew the rules. If he didn’t wanna sleep with the fishes, he shoulda played better in the Heroes Throwdown,” said Fraiser in what was distinctly a 1920s gangster accent, when asked for a comment on the recent murder.
This isn’t the first major accusation made against Fraiser in recent weeks, as many players in the Heroclix community believe he single-handedly started COVID-19 in an attempt to ensure the cancellation of the 2020 Heroclix National Championship and extend his reign as champion for another year. Fraiser was unable to comment on this rumor, as he was too busy coughing on WizKids official Penny Keñya.
Despite the potential legal trouble coming his way, Fraiser’s Clix Mafia Online Punchstravaganza is moving forward as scheduled. The victor of the highly-anticipated tournament will receive one of the countless Thanos ultra chases he totally didn’t murder anyone to obtain, and Fraiser is assuring participants that the blood splattered all over Thanos’ card can easily be washed off.